I have so much I want to say, but I have no idea where to begin. I guess we can start in two thousand seven.
I was in high school and my life consisted of school Monday through Thursday afternoon and partying Thursday night through Sunday night. Each party or get-together that I attended required a brand new outfit. I would spend my parent’s hard-earned money on expensive clothes and shoes. I would also spend most of my weekend grooming myself and straightening my hair so that when the evening came around, I would be flawless.
Then college happened and my party outfits turned to t-shirts and jeans. Once I started to work as an EMT, I lived in my uniform. On my days off, I stayed in pajamas all day. Little by little my closet went from fabulous to barely there.
I found myself struggling to put an outfit together or style my hair so I would end up canceling any plans I had.
Lucky for me, my husband, Jay Jay, and I met at work and I did not have to try too hard to impress him. Soon thereafter, we got engaged, married, and now we are parents.
The loss of interest in my appearance began right after I dropped out of high school, but it was not until I become a mom that the effects of being a hot-mess started to overwhelm me. It got to a point where I would not take my son anywhere because I was ashamed of the way I looked. My hair was always in a messy bun, my eyebrows were never plucked, my nails were always brittle, and the only clothes I owned were leggings, a pair of jeans, and a handful of oversized shirts.
When I first noticed, I wanted to change, but I could not justify the amount of money I would have to spend. It was like if I was not worthy of the investment. Then it hit me. It was a regular day in a regular work week when Jay Jay washed some of my clothes and forgot to put it in the dryer. I woke up to my only pair of work pants wet and no time to wait for them to dry. The only other pants I had were an old pair of blue jeans that were three sizes too small. These jeans also had two sexy holes right where my thighs touched. I had to go to work that day with ill-fitting jeans and I got to feel completely insecure and worthless.
It was that day that I decided to change my life and that change began with finding clothes that would work for me. With a capsule wardrobe I got just that and even though my hot-mess-life involves more than just my clothes, finding a style that I feel confident in (hello, casual chic) and curating a capsule with only clothes that I feel beautiful in has made a huge difference. Also, the process of acquiring the clothes has been very gentle on my wallet.
It’s quite shameful admitting this, really. But I think it is necessary to speak my truth because without it you will not understand why I am so passionate about capsule wardrobes. I am nowhere near having the perfect capsule, but I feel a lot of peace knowing that there is a way for me to feel confident in my own body again. This will not only benefit me, but it will also benefit my husband and my baby boy who needs a mama that is willing to stop hiding.
If my story resonates with you in any way, please feel free to message me. I want to hear your truth and I promise that admitting to it will set your free.
You are beautiful and you are loved,